..my battle stance..

I must have underestimated the 'culture shock' factor that people always talk about when they move to other countries. Even when I watched the best exotic marigold hotel, I didn't really think much about it. Obviously you would get a shock when you are from a first world country such as UK and you come to a 'developing' country such as India. But Singapore and Indonesia? I adapted comfortably when I moved to Singapore 13 yrs ago. It was only a matter of different language mainly. The 'kiasuism' was not much an issue. Rather it was fun to observe. I guess that was because geographically these two countries are close. And Jakarta, despite being a mess traffic-wise, is actually quite a cosmopolitan city. But now.. me, an Indonesian, who lived in Singapore for 13 years, on my way back to my own country, my own town! I can't believe it. I am having a culture shock. I think partly because I spent my 20s mainly in Singapore. I suspect between...

we have probably met, literally, thousands of people in our lives. and some of them became friends. a very few, became good friends. and if we are lucky, we would have one or two true friends for life. anyway.. the point is.. i think many times we are often drawn to people who seem to be.."great".. and we take for granted those 'ordinary' people who are always there for us. those who are always available for us. but i learn that it would be a great, great mistake to do that. i hope you and i have the wisdom to treasure the ones who truly matter in the end.

One good illustration taken from Mr Maxwell's book: "An adviser to Lincoln recommended a particular person for a cabinet position, but Lincoln balked at the suggestion. He said, "I don't like the man's face." His adviser said, "But sir, he can not be held responsible for his face." But Lincoln replied, "Every man over forty (40 years) is responsible for his face."  When we are kids, we can blame anyone for anything. But as we grow up, we have to understand that we are responsible for where and how we end up in life. Because as far as God is concerned, I believe He only has good plans for us. He doesn't necessarily throw in BMW or Penthouse inside the package, but it sure is going to be a God-glorifying destiny. He died to give us life.. life in abundance.. abundance of testimony of God's goodness. I pray that God will teach us each day to live it..to the fullest..of His glory.

a friend said that it sounds 'galau' hah. but sometimes.. when you are in certain situation, the best you can do to to overcome all the unhappiness and disappointment is to just tell yourself.. mou ii.. forget it..

Finally I pick up a new book, after so many months of hibernation. When you run out of idea of what to write, it's time to read more. I read this advise somewhere. Quite true. So now I am reading John Maxwell's Road Map To Success. It was a birthday present for me, years ago hah. That's how bad a reader I am. But at least there is improvement now heh. It's a very..interesting book. It asks questions that when you are 31 and you are not very sure how to answer, you would start looking at yourself and realise a change has to take place. At the same time, though.. I feel that I will never be a John Maxwell. There are things I would apply.. and things I would not. But overall.. a good book. Especially for those who have been questioning things like.. How can I define success? What is my purpose? How to reach there? etc etc etc.. And you are never too old to admit that you dunno the answer. Coz I believe many people die at old age without knowing the...

so that's how it is. this game that everyone is playing. so play along.

here it comes again.. i don't know how much longer i can take this kind of situation. these are the moments when i wonder if i am suited for this profession. well.. i can only apologise. pointing fingers and finding faults also won't change a thing. can only pray that it will work out well in the end. surely.. God has everything under control. here comes weekend.

it's hard to be positive sometimes, when things are so pathetic and well.. your existence seems to be worse than 'nothing'. hah. but well.. your only option is still.. to be positive.

Depend on God to cause you to be at the right place at the right time, to have the right happenings happen in your life today!- Joseph Prince What Pst Prince was saying in his recent devotional was similar to what we were talking about in our secret society last meeting. It's not always the swift that wins the race, or the strong that wins the battle. It's about the right place and the right time. And we can only rely on God to position us at such a place, such a time, for such a great thing to happen in our life.

i think it's still the most surreal thing ever in life. there is so much to it that you could make movie after movie after movie, song after song after song, just talking about being in love. and the beauty of it is.. no one can be too smart when they are in love.

two things a human can't conceal, sneezing and.. the way you look at someone you love. happiness is wrapped within silliness.

can't help feeling that the more 'mature' you get, the more formulaic love becomes. it's all about finding someone who ticks all or most of the boxes. because your life has become too important to waste on someone who is not good enough. yeah.. sounds right, isn't it?

..something that I foresee coming ... tapi ga nyangka secepet itu.. a friend of mine said this in email. a different friend said almost exactly the same thing, the day before, for a totally different issue. and I kind of have the same issue too -__-" something that I foresee coming.. but didn't expect it to be that fast.. life is indeed full of surprises. i hope.. we don't utter the same words when Christ come for the second time. let's foresee him coming, and expect that to be anytime soon. let's be prepared, and expectant. maranatha!

it's not a good thing to be sentimental, I think. coz time can be cruel and it can make even the most precious thing irrelevant. it changes almost everything too. heck even Singapore has changed, and not for the better, according to some of their citizens. when I first came here in 1996, Singapore was.. how do I put it? It was just different. I fell in love with that Singapore. my heart has not changed since then. Singapore, on the other hand, has changed. I may have attempted to return to my own country. But I have always loved that very Singapore I used to know. and some 'wise' people would tell you it is pointless to look back to that old Singapore. it is gone, for good. and you just have to embrace this new Singapore. I suppose these very people would also be the ones who embrace genetically modified seeds and every other 'solution' that lead to domination of anti-Christ in future. Okay.. I digress. oh well..

actually I think should stop blogging on the shrewd wife, coz somehow those posts lead to many traffic -__-" but how can I stop talking about it when episode after episode, this story continues to amaze me unlike other drama which tend to be draggy after the first 10 episodes. all thanks to xie an zhen's character. this woman is beyond believable. the way she dealt with her husband who forced for divorce, and her cousin who was the third party, and practically everybody else around her. she was anything but 'textbook'. and i admire the script writer for creating such a selfless, magnetic character. i hope one day I too would write such a story.