..my battle stance..

wow I am actually back to this blog. between Apr 27 2018 and now.. what has happened? I officially proposed to my girlfriend (wah.. trust me you gonna miss that word), got married, and.. became a dad. yeah.. all in a matter of less than 2 years. now when you consider the fact that in 2015 I would not have the slightest idea how things would turn out, it just goes to show how life changes in a blink. How is married life? Well.. I am one of those who has pretty pragmatic view when it comes to marriage. I have seen enough to know that relationship is messy. So.. I must say marriage has been way way better than my expectation hah.. For example.. I knew that my wife is a smart woman. I knew some of her shortcoming too.. (and there are some I didn't know till we got married, of course) BUT... here's the big bonus. I didn't know she can be that adorably funny in her own way. Not funny like a standup comedian funny but.. you know.. she makes me laugh. Trust me....

probably it was expected by some, probably no one would have thought of it 10 years ago. and ten years ago was when so many things happened, both the ones that were meant to be. and the ones that weren't. both the end and the beginning. it happened a decade ago. and today.. everything that was then.. isn't now. everything feels a bit blurry by now.. all those feeling.. all those memories. and today.. here we are. and this is it. the final leap. this is it. the only one that will still matter. years and decades later. this i pray.

this is not ranting or complaining.. those who know me well know that I like to make this kind trivial observation. and i have long made peace with the way the world works. so few months ago I stayed at our friend's beautiful villa at Bali. she happened to have two dogs who were roaming around freely and obviously, being someone who is not into furry and lick-y pets, I was troubled most of the times. couldn't get my head around the idea of eating and playing with dogs at the same time. and as i observed, i realised that probably more than 90% of our friends (there were like 20++ people) who were there were either lovers of dog or at least, they were dog- friendly folks, totally cool with getting licked all over and stuff. I knew I belong to the minority group but I didn't expect the group to be that small. I also noticed how some of my friends were astonished by the fact that I did not like dogs. 'how could you not like dogs?' pretty much that was the re...

As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.- Andrew Carnegie I find this statement to be so very true. Also partly the reason why I blog less. I place less value on what I think I know.. unless I eventually put them into purposeful action. Which makes me realise.. I might know too much and do too little. People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity, no matter how impressive their other talents. - Andrew Carnegie It is true that unless the Lord build the house, our hard work will be in vain. However.. it is worth noting too that even the Lord instructs us to be persistent in asking. In other word, a great motivation is needed to keep us going. I had a glimpse of a book written by the sister of our friend recently. It was mainly a book about life lesson(s). She is a good writer and I tend to enjoy reading her thoughts in her blog. While it became evident quite instantly that it was a book written by a...

blogging was the last thing in my mind tonight. but sleeping doesn't feel right.. yet. so here I am. as it turns out, 2017 has gradually led me to another valley. valley of uncertainty, of anxiety and fear. while this is not the first time i have to deal with financial difficulty, this is certainly the first time everything seems to happen at the same time. from my parents health situation to my daily need to my near future plan of settling down It feels like something huge is going to happen. It could either be a major crisis.. or a major breakthrough. And I am reminded of the simple words that I received at the beginning of the year. 'Respond with Praise'. It is not easy really. and at times I feel like I am running on empty. But here I am.. back on my knees. Asking God to help me to respond right. To bring Him my highest praise even as I walk into the lowest point of my journey. And to see His promise prevails. The very thing my eyes have not seen. Th...

today was the first time I helped out in a singles connect event. a simple lunch together really.. but a really amazing one. we got like 8 ppl from our church and 12 from our friends church. all indonesians and it was so fulfilling to see them connecting and got along so well. everyone were so sporting.. woah. one reason why i agreed to help making this event happens is because I love the idea of connecting good people. good people who would have not met otherwise. good people who are victims of nonsensical boundaries. some people are just against this kind of stuff. some think 'it is God who provides.. I don't have to do all these'. that statement is partially right. but they totally miss the point. and they plant false idea on their peers with such 'conviction'. another reason why I am for this kind of stuff. because there are people with genuine need and humility to admit that. of course not everyone will hv positive thought about this. as the sayi...