Sometimes ago I watched an anime, where there is one funny character, who has always been on the search for the 'best place'. A place where he can live in peace and be happy.
I thought I have found such place. A very nice place where I could seek refuge and find great companions. I thought so because the master of that place is indeed the best and the only refuge you could count on. So I thought the place must be the best place.
I saw the old residents of the place; they looked happy and strongly bonded. I was never good at blending in but well, this place should be different. So I gave it a try.
Time flew. Some of the old residents are now gone. Some of the newer residents have become as happy as the old residents I first saw. I am neither out nor in. Some residents are really nice; just like the master. But like every other place, a person like me would encounter some people who would give me those unfriendly stare, those 'you are good for nothing' stare.
Well what can I say? I am indeed not as good as some of the residents. I am not that friendly to the newer residents. I don't hang out with the residents much. I only try to give my help with what I believe I can be of help whenever there is chance. But apparently that wasn't enough.
I saw some of the residents who could not blend in and they walked away. They blamed the other residents for being not good enough. But the master have accepted all of us without asking. He accepts the good and the not so good.
And it so happens that I am the not so good. So I learn to accept all those unfriendly stare. After all, some of the residents are really nice. And the master, ah.. he is never less than amazing.
Actualy the master has also entrusted me to an elder who is also nice. And the elder has entrusted me some responsibilities I enjoy doing. But these responsibilities are also the source of some of my heartaches.
I owe the master a lot. And I owe many of the residents a lot. Even if some of them hurt me, I think that is just life. That place is just like any other place on earth. I learn to understand that you can never expect that place to be as good as heaven.
Sometimes I just wish leave that place and vanish. I am tired of the expectations and demand. I am tired of being asked to be someone else. I am tired of following rules the master never set himself.
But I will only do so if that is the master's wish.
I thought I have found such place. A very nice place where I could seek refuge and find great companions. I thought so because the master of that place is indeed the best and the only refuge you could count on. So I thought the place must be the best place.
I saw the old residents of the place; they looked happy and strongly bonded. I was never good at blending in but well, this place should be different. So I gave it a try.
Time flew. Some of the old residents are now gone. Some of the newer residents have become as happy as the old residents I first saw. I am neither out nor in. Some residents are really nice; just like the master. But like every other place, a person like me would encounter some people who would give me those unfriendly stare, those 'you are good for nothing' stare.
Well what can I say? I am indeed not as good as some of the residents. I am not that friendly to the newer residents. I don't hang out with the residents much. I only try to give my help with what I believe I can be of help whenever there is chance. But apparently that wasn't enough.
I saw some of the residents who could not blend in and they walked away. They blamed the other residents for being not good enough. But the master have accepted all of us without asking. He accepts the good and the not so good.
And it so happens that I am the not so good. So I learn to accept all those unfriendly stare. After all, some of the residents are really nice. And the master, ah.. he is never less than amazing.
Actualy the master has also entrusted me to an elder who is also nice. And the elder has entrusted me some responsibilities I enjoy doing. But these responsibilities are also the source of some of my heartaches.
I owe the master a lot. And I owe many of the residents a lot. Even if some of them hurt me, I think that is just life. That place is just like any other place on earth. I learn to understand that you can never expect that place to be as good as heaven.
Sometimes I just wish leave that place and vanish. I am tired of the expectations and demand. I am tired of being asked to be someone else. I am tired of following rules the master never set himself.
But I will only do so if that is the master's wish.
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