..my battle stance..

I thought I would have blogged more this year. I was wrong. I expected a challenging year. I was right. A friend tweeted that 2012 has been her best year yet. And how often do I wish this for others on new year. But 2012 isn't my best yet. It is memorable though. And thru it all, God's been good. He preserves me and my family. And the highlight at the end of this year is definitely my brother's job. That's gotta be 'the' Christmas present. So here we are. The last day of 2012. God has left us with more questions than answers at this juncture. So much so that I am not sure what I need to pray for first this morning. In a simple imaginary world of mine, I wish I would land a job in Jakarta that earns $20-30k a month tomorrow. I wish I would start planning with my life partner too tomorrow. I wish at least one of these come true for goodness sake! Our friend Pi would have wished to be stranded on Pacific Ocean with his dream lover too. But s...

seems like the world's not going to end today. which means many things. for some of us who haven't got a single clue yet on our life partner, well... the search is back on. for some of us who are planning for their wedding days, well.. glad for you! the party is on. if, hypothetically speaking, you can choose whether or not the world ends today.. what would you choose? setting aside all the issues of fulfilling our destinies, calling, the unsaved, etc etc.. I kinda go for the end of the world scenario.

That's the theme of Mr Taleb's new book. Mr Taleb, of course, is the guy who shot into fame with his book 'Black Swan'. One way to be anti-fragile is to be receptive of change. Whatever it means. To accept that your beloved's feeling could change one day. To accept that that your feeling could change one day. To accept that everyone and everything could and would change.. one day. And that one day can be as random as it gets. Then you embrace that randomness as the beauty of life. That way your system would not break down when that change and thus disappointment kick in. Your damage will be minimal. Which reminds me of a quote from that movie "Turn Left Turn Right". That certainty is beautiful, but uncertainty is more beautiful still. So Mr Taleb is not that original after all. So I have learned this years ago. Unfortunately I have yet to master this. I don't know about you. And I wonder..  what is the strength behind anti-fragi...

I am about to move company with my friend, Brother John. I have been speaking to few of the leaders in our next company as we need to decide which division to join. At one point John asked me if we would offend one of the divisions. Because we initially seemed to be keen in joining them. But we gave up on the idea. Well.. what I like about working with John is that we are quite similar personality-wise. This is one of the examples. We tend to be over-concerned about how others would feel. But of course the good thing about working with others is this thing called feedback. So i told him not to be worried. Coz the other party may not be that bothered after all. But there are many situations where I can't rely on someone else for feedback. So I have to tell myself not to be worried too much for what the other party feels. Because while I am sitting here being concerned, that person may just be in the midst of having good time and well.. that sucks, folks :)

you should not care too much for anything, else you'd risk giving up on that very thing you care too much for.

“Do you see what we’ve got? An unshakable kingdom! And do you see how thankful we must be? Not only thankful, but brimming with worship, deeply reverent before God. For God is not an indifferent bystander. He’s actively cleaning house, torching all that needs to burn, and he won’t quit until it’s all cleansed. God himself is Fire!” Hebrews 12:28 MSG Somehow the messages for the last few days have something to do with worship. Hmm...

Say no to wrong.      Learn to do good. Work for justice.      Help the down-and-out. Stand up for the homeless.      Go to bat for the defenseless. (Isaiah 1) Ouch.. 

My 'Clash of Clans' game has turned Christmas with the snow effect and some Christmas special potion thrown in. Changi has been playing Christmas jingles. Haven't been to Orchard but I think the trees would've been lighting up by now. It has been almost a year since our Na Xie Nian trip. I still have not fulfilled the white Christmas wish. But it was a good winter trip. Still wish I can somehow buy last minute tic to somewhere with snows and wonderful Christmas atmosphere. Well.. there is Israel too. That is yet to come true. The radio dj was saying today that she noticed many people got engaged or married in Nov/Dec period. She thought maybe coz of Christmas effect. It just seems like a good time for a good thing to happen. I pray then for all of you my close ones that good things happen to you in this season of grace. it's not about whether we've been good this year. but coz He's been good to us.

In between 15 and 25, we will inevitably have those nites.. when we dream, and dream we did. staring at the vast nite sky.. with thoughts countless as stars. wondering where will I be tomorrow? and who will stand right here by my side? and what of this friendship? what of this love? if only I know which voice to follow, if only I know which hand to hold, if only I know which path to take. but does anyone really know? don't they wonder.. what lies beyond this night sky? are they dreaming fairy tale? are they planning family tale? and that's why we loved to stay awake at night, when all the adults have put their wild thought to sleep, while we gleefully awaited dawn.

you can't expect people to be positive about you when you are being negative about them as and when you like it. it has to work both ways.

My friend just forwarded me an email from a company she engaged to buy a freezer for her baking business start up in Jakarta. Well.. seriously.. Indo.. what a jungle! And before you read the below, rather long, email.. do bear in mind that this company has this motto: Fast & Reliable! Dear Ibu xxxxxx, Sebelumnya kami mohon maaf atas keterlambatan reply kami. Hal ini disebabkan saya harus mengajukan complain ibu ini ke management kami. Bersama ini kami ingin menyampaikan permohonan maaf yang sebesar-besarnya atas insiden yang terjadi untuk unit pesanan Ibu. Sebenarnya prosedur yang berlaku diperusahaan kami adalah untuk setiap pengiriman barang hanya berlaku sampai unit diturunkan dari mobil saja . Untuk pemindahan unit dari luar hingga sampai lokasi yang dimaksud biasanya pihak logistic kami akan minta bantuan dari pihak customer untuk tenaga tambahan apabila unit yang dikirim termasuk unit besar dan rentan kecelakaan kerja. Informasi yang kami dapat dar...

We see this terms a lot nowadays on fb. People are selling, in layman terms, second hand apparels and accessories by calling them pre-loved bags, wallets, etc. First of all.. if prewar means before war, then preloved must mean before love right? But it doesn't make sense. Of course it probably is shortened from the words 'previously loved'. But I wonder does it make us feel better then, to buy a 'previously loved but now unloved' item compares to a 'previously used but now unused' item. So far most of the items that are marketed with 'pre-loved' tag are targeted for ladies. Maybe that's why I don't get it. I would have called them 'second chance' items probably.

this guy's comment on fb hor.. pardon my French.. but it just make me sibeh du lan #$%*# wahlaowee... -___-

I wish we can just play it simple and sincere. I wish we don't have to play, honestly. Just heart to heart.. with all their honesty. Because I don't want to miss this.. not because of some games of vanity. Sincerely.

well.. seriously, I think I need to get together with the fantastic four to strengthen my conviction now and then. though we can't no longer call ourselves fantastic four nowadays. yeah.. just some random lines. in the month of sept. just like some random scream and shout that can be heard from inside my  couple housemates room now and then. no.. it's not 'that' kind of scream. this is almost like a yelling kind. dunno what went on inside.. but the couple always come out smiling. so i guess it's just their way of communicating with each other. or maybe some married  couples can give me enlightening. coz my another single housemate looked as puzzled as i was that night when we were sitting at the living room and suddenly the wife yelled inside the room. you know.. that kind of 'Big Bang Theory' boys kind of look. oh yeah.. in case you have a single girl friend who have not found her soul mate, do consider my housemate. he cooks, he cleans, he ...

It's one of those days. Unexpected conversation. Tough questions. Shaken. I wish you were here. Even if just to smile at me quietly.

never knew they were making movie for my favorite series. aha.. xie an zhen is back! this series is as good as it gets when it comes to storyline and characters. the finale.. of course.. will answer the one question everyone were asking as the series ended. is xie an zhen going to reunite with her guilt ridden husband or is she going to start anew with her charismatic boss? well.. i know my preference. but i'd rather stay quiet.

for ages the one thing I would hear, 95% of the time, when I introduce my name is.. "oh.. what a common name". haha. so I was surprised when this person that spoke to me today made a remark. "btw you got a nice name... it means God's beloved". it makes me smile somehow. yeah.. as common as it is.. I do love this name. and a certain Judah king being the man in the bible I aspire to be the most (Jesus excluded), I wouldn't have it any other way either.

one point that John Maxwell pointed out in his book was the principle of trading up in life. you see.. in life we make decision after decision. whether it's career switch, or relationship commitment.  whether it's decision to get married, or to stay single. whether it's to move to another church or city. well.. what we, as human, naturally want is to keep whatever good things we have as we move onto the new situation or position. but the reality is, something gotta give. you probably get quick promotion in your career.. at the expense of your relationship with colleagues and time with families. with each climb we make, we have to trade something valuable away. the principle of alchemy. you cant have it all dear friend..

Just want to say that I am grateful. Thank God.. He is indeed our Jehovah Jireh. If anything... the journey for the last four years have taught me to rely on Him for my daily bread.

when all you care about is for your heart not to break, where could I post my longing to?

Mikitani, the founder of Rakuten whose article I mentioned before, is a neat freak. One of his uncompromisable principles is for each of Rakuten staff to have a neat desk with minimal presence of.. er.. anything. That would enhance work effectiveness, he argued. Well.. that's true.. I believe. But for old friends who have seen my desk at our NUS halls, or my desk now, they would know that I am the Rakuten's antithesis. I have lotsa things on my desk. And during our english course days when I first came to sg, my friends would call my bag a magic bag. Because I always had difficulty in finding things inside. I simply had too many things there. I am sure with some instilled discipline, I could make my desk and bag neat. But.. somehow that would be the case of losing your identity, I feel :D coz.. I think there is place for people whose creativity and imagination are liberated in the midst of chaos. somewhere, ages ago.. there must be some brilliant inventors or some...

This Mickey guy is indeed a brilliant guy! Nothing can take the place of persistence. Below excerpt taken from and belong to this link: http://www.wired.co.uk/magazine/archive/2012/09/features/man-on-a-mission?page=2 When Rakuten Ichiba opened for business on May 1, 1997, it had just 13 shops, most of which were owned by Mikitani's friends. It took a year of hard work to sign up 100. "Every day I would roll up my sleeves and pound the pavement in search of a little mom-and-pop shop to bring in," he writes in Principles for Success . "Whenever a potential target came into sight, I would pump my arms and legs up and down or do some quick push-ups so I could work up a sweat. Then I would burst into the store all out of breath. I knew that I would gain a more sympathetic ear if I came across as a regular guy who spoke from the heart, as opposed to a sharply dressed salesman." "If you just want to make money, go to Goldman Sachs," he says. "T...

There is this theory that.. no matter what field it is ( be it painting, playing music instrument, language, etc).. as long as you invest one hour on it every day.. you will be a master in 5 years time. I would like to put this theory to test.

Last week was winkazo's housewarming. I kinda expect some friends but I did not expect the house to be packed hah. but isn't it great for housewarming? And of course, it was full of happy noises too. toddlers were in full force. the new born, the walking ones, and then there was Farrell too, who was like the big brother among the rest. He just quietly and intelligently watched the TV. I guess he thought, "why the hell are all these kids so immature? can't they just sit still and enjoy the show?" At that age, kids grow at exponential pace. Every new trick they learn is a great accomplishment. And you could really tell which are the more senior kids. By their height, size, speech ability, level of understanding, walking ability, etc. And even though we have no idea how these kids learn to talk.. it just happens. I still don't understand how my toddler cousin could speak in Mandarin, Hokkian, English and Indo interchangeably. Most kids would instinct...

the world has gone crazy. there was time when lance armstrong's live strong wristbands were trending worldwide. and his story was almost like a legend, like one of those too good to be true movie. he was the very definition of determination. he was the symbol of hope. well.. like many i do not know whether or not he cheated. but whatever drug it was, if he did use them, it must be one helluva drug that could win him 7 titles of tour de france. i am on the camp that lean towards believing his side of story. but that's not the point i am thinking about now. i am simply pondering.. the very definition of success. is he a successful man? (setting aside the allegations) in terms of how he survived cancer and won tour de france, of course that was a great, great success story. but really.. without wanting to point on anything specific (you can check out wikipedia for the general story of his life).. has he led a meaningful and successful life?

I could never get used to this miserable feeling of missing you. That's something I was never designed for.

Merdeka!!! Let's start with that hah. Our independence day. 67 years of history as one nation. I came across this book by one of Sukarno's daughters on Soeharto's premeditated coup de tat. The infamous 'truth' of G30S PKI. The 60s. I imagine it must have been such a dangerous era to grow up in. And yet.. it was such a happening era. And then we had the relatively stabler 70s and 80s. My fond memory of this era are those Indonesian movies which always have some of these things: - scene of cars circling Bunderan HI - protagonists with sunglasses and nice white shoes (dan sisir yg muncul sedikit dr saku belakang celana) - in case of horror movies.. one word: Suzanna. She was simply the Queen of Horror. And I loved watching her movies late night alone while studying. - and of course... Warkop DKI!! Believe it or not.. they meant a lot to my memories of my childhood haa. 90s.. It started well. We had news of gulf war bla bla bla but our country seemed to b...

when you discover that love could go so much deeper than you thought it could.

what? ........

can't think of a more creative title. i suppose my life, almost everything and almost everyone significant in it, has been in one way or another related to the little red dot. in one way or another, Singapore has played a part. so.. thank you Singapore. I, for one, can never join those opposition parties who scorn the incumbent for dishing out scholarships to foreign students. Yeah.. we are all biased and self-centered, aren't we? for without those scholarships, I would not have made it to Singapore. It doesn't necessarily mean I would have been poorer or doomed today had I not gone to NUS 12 years ago. It could have been the opposite. But either way, I am eternally grateful for the 12 years journey. Part of what I received there is what I would keep for eternity.Knowledge of Christ. And another thing I treasure is the thing called 'perspective'. And for those foreign talent haters out there.. I believe my 7-8 yrs of working there have somewhat contri...

If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies, Or being hated, don’t give way to hating, And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise: If you can dream – and not make dreams your master; If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster And treat those two impostors just the same; If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, And stoop and build ‘em up with worn-out tools: If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breathe a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your t...

current fave songs! Love Song, the 2nd song, is particularly.. hmm.. how do I put it?

Fukuyama Masaharu-  Kazoku Ni Narou shiawase ni narou yo...

I was happily exploring my new S3 while the guy couple of my seats to my left was busy with his ipad. Typical good looking young professional with some snobbish attitude. Kinda remind me of someone who married one of our friends hah. And beside him was a lady in her 20s. A typical Indonesian Chinese, fair and sweet. The lady was talking to him about someone. He was quick to point out that he disliked that person. In a snobbish tone, while keeping his eyes fixed on his ipad. And then they had more conversation which I didn't bother to pay attention to. At one point, the lady caught my attention as she suddenly spoke in a loud voice. She was pointing at his head in a caring way while uttering, "Dari mana siii otak sejahat iniii??" Yeah, with a caring, loving tone of course. She couldn't believe that her boyfriend (or spouse) could have such an evil thought in his mind. Yet.. it didn't seem to matter much for her. I guess.. as long as he cared for he...

somehow my friend's words keep ringing inside my head. he said.. 'enjoy all these while you can.. " by 'these'.. he meant, all those things that may seem like troublesome tests at the moment but will eventually turn into precious memories by the time we 'graduate'. in this context.. marriage is the graduation day. it's like how I would speak to some of our juniors in the past. how I would tell them to enjoy those exams they were wishing to get rid of. how we kept telling them that they would definitely miss their school days. my friend misses his pre-married days. so when he watched 'Friends with Kids' movie, he thought, "hey, this is perfect!!" and he told his wife that heh. he was really upset when the guy ended up marrying the girl in the movie. i couldn't really agree with him on that part. but at the same time.. well in the context of relationship.. i just feel there is too much bullshit that we tend to be...

there used to be a bestselling book with that title. a far cry from today's motivational or success coaching books. chicken soup was simple and rather than altering our mind, it nourishes our soul. such was my conversation with someone I could call a 'good friend' tonight. maybe I have been too proud to admit that I need such a conversation. to admit that I have been fooling myself and I need some trashing. well.. some good trashing from a true friend. i almost missed out this meeting, and am glad i didn't. God does have everything under his control. the talk affirmed so many things I have been afraid to admit. aren't you glad for such a friend? in my friend's words, I need someone who is willing to break into the walls I build up in order to find the true me. in my words, that would be the true me, along with all my vulnerabilities and stupidity. to me a true friend is not just someone who is there to support, but that person is there to do the ...

For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. (Romans 14:17) I have been to a "Reform" type of church last weekend. As expected, the teaching was almost an opposite of what we are hearing from people like Joseph Prince and Joel Osteen. A good sharing to ponder on, nonetheless. Because any of us who seriously consider how we should live to imitate Christ will undoubtedly feel the pull from both side of the camp. But somewhere, somehow.. I believe lies the answer to this struggle. Between the so-called 'prosperity gospel' and the..er.. I dunno what the opposite camp is called. But irregardless of which camp we side with, or maybe we stand somewhere in between.. I suppose we must always remind ourselves that our gospel is not defined by the visibles. Neither the abundance of wealth nor the lack of it. Neither the existence of suffering nor the absence of it. I suppose.. our gospel and...

gua deg2an kalo lg bertemu dgn peluang bisnis yg..kalo org medan bilang.. 'ngeri ngeri sedap'. tidak lain tidak bukan, adalah bisnis berbau ponzi scheme. ngga tau napa, sering ditawarin bisnis ky gini. gua pikir biasa yg suka ditarget-in itu ibu2 rumah tangga -__- trakhir wkt itu ya si bisnis emas 'gen ne va' itu. yg mana byk bgt yg curiga, tp byk jg org sekitar yg bnrnya diem2 uda taroh duid disana :P biasa kl 'ponzi' itu kan dlm 1-2 taon si pelaku bakal kabur. nah tp sampe hari ini si bisnis emas ini masi berjalan. mskipun sgt disayangkan gua ga punya cukup byk duid utk diparkir disana. utk yg si emas gen ne va ini, gua rasa intinya si dia bkn ponzi. tp pastinya dia punya resiko gede dlm bisnis dia. jd, know the risk before you play the game lah ya. hasil 2% per bulan itu uda trdgr sgt gila kan. cuman kalah sedikit sm untung nya ah long. hrsnya para ah long bertobat aja dan taroh duid di sini. ga perlu manpower, ga perlu modal cat, ga perl...

I'll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness,    the taste of ashes, the poison I've swallowed. I remember it all—oh, how well I remember—    the feeling of hitting the bottom. But there's one other thing I remember,    and remembering, I keep a grip on hope: God's loyal love couldn't have run out,    his merciful love couldn't have dried up. They're created new every morning.    How great your faithfulness! I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over).    He's all I've got left.  (Lamentations 3:19-24) I believe in Him who breathes life into the dead. He who breathes spring into the freezing winter. He who takes and breaks and molds and makes new.. the Potter, the Director, the Creator. Even when I am crushed to the bottom of the valley, I know I can still look up to Him, hold on to His Words, and call on the Name that is above it all.. Jesus.

I promise you this, trust me. So.. Let's start with some background here. Arsenal- a football club in England for the rest of us (who don't support Man U). Just like Apple, the computer for the rest of us (who don't support Windows). Gunners- terms for Arsenal football player. Gooners- terms for Arsenal football fans. so finally it comes. the news that break the hearts of, literally, millions of gooners. we are on the verge of losing our best player, again. on top of that, our captain. the man who we think, may be different from the rest of them who left earlier. Last year I wrote something about Cesc Fabregas, my then all time favorite Gunner. He left for the club that must not be named. He was captain too, then. I thought he was different too, then. Now it's Robin van Persie (RVP). His no.10 shirt was once worn by a Dutch maestro called Dennis Bergkamp. Just like Dennis, we brought RVP from a club where he failed to shine despite his talent. Just l...

to hurt and to be hurt. it's not the question of if, or who. it's the question of when. so.. the real question is.. will love fail.. or will love prevail?

It was the moment before dawn. I made a walk to the kitchen. For a drink. For a look. I was quite sure what to expect from the water I was drinking. But I wasn't really sure what to expect from the world outside my kitchen window. Sometimes you would come across some people who just walk back to their home. And you try to guess what they were doing all night long. Sometimes you would come across fighting couples who shout at each other. Well.. that's pretty common. This time it was the full moon that caught my attention. Bright and alone. It was most beautiful. But nobody was around to appreciate it. Because they have works and life to live under the sun. Nevertheless.. there it was. the moon. it shone. for everything. for nothing.

For some reason posting lama ini muncul jd top visited post hari ini. Ngga tau kenapa tiba2 ada org2 yg mencari title ini. Mgkn krn lagunya hari ini diputer somewhere, whether itu di media, ato itu in the mind of someones out there. indeed. kebenaran yang sangat benar. so here's what the post was saying: abis baca cerpen nya si dewi lestari. cerpen yang menemani lagu terkenal itu.. malaikat juga tahu. dan si penulis mengungkapkan satu kebenaran yang erm.. sangat benar. si wanita dicintai dua pria. pria pertama yang mencinta dia lebih dari sepenuhnya, pria pertama yang mencinta dia tanpa punya pilihan untuk kemungkinan yang lain. dan pria kedua yang mencintai dia.. mungkin sepenuhnya, pria kedua yang memiliki pilihan.. lalu memilih dia. si wanita mencintai satu pria, pria kedua yang memiliki pilihan dan memilih dia. karena si wanita tidak ingin dicintai oleh seseorang yang tidak punya pilihan. sekalipun boleh diadu cinta kedua pria itu, malaikat juga tahu, siapa...

i thought of this conversation we had on Sunday afternoon. on victoria secret show. girls must think that guys would love watching that show. i don't even need to explain why right? but er.. no. i think, and i would be surprised to be wrong.. guys are not into this show. okay, if our habit of messing around with remote control happens to incidentally bring us to a channel that is broadcasting that show, we would probably pause for a moment. a moment that lasts not longer than when we pause for, say.. spongebob square pants show. not because his square pants are more appealing than victoria secret's. obviously. the sames goes to this event that was organised by one of the churches in Jkt. it's called CONNECT, strictly for 25yo and above SINGLES, and it's NOT a matchmaking event. Yeah..RIGHT lol. According to a first time visitor that I interviewed, this church seems to have many good looking guys and girls. So you would think that guys would jump at t...

Hiccup and Toothless are possibly among the most memorable man and beast pair I have seen throughout my years of watching animations. One of the most memorable movies too. For many reasons :) And today I am so glad to find out that they are brought to live by the folks who did 'Walking with Dinosaurs' thingy. But this time, they got dragons flying across the arena. that's a whole new level of awesomeness. Though to be fair I think it will be difficult for them to get Toothless flying at lightning speed like the one in animation. In any case.. I am thrilled! And this world tour gonna take 5 years. I am not sure when they will reach Sg. But if there is any chance of getting cheap tic to Oz then...

Your light will shine! one particular church is gaining all the wrong publicity at the moment and despite probably being interested to know the truth, all i can say is that.. God is in control. friends from different denominations and countries are praying for this church.because they recognise this church as part of the body. that's awesome. i can't say that i understand their crossover project, but i know that the old principle remains- if it's of God, he himself would defend it. and surely if God is for them, who can be against them? so.. all i can do is just to pray for His hand to be over the whole things. and that at the end of the day, His light shines.

The platform thru which I convey my message is the very platform which I write against. The irony. Lately I have grown disillusioned with social media and all those chat apps. Things like fb, twitter, blog, bbm, and if you are an App  hunter you probably know some other similar apps too. Point is.. they allow you to share a piece of your life that can be expressed on screen with your circle of friends/families. And those chat apps- they allow you to be connected and detached at the same time. It's not that I am against using them. I use them and many times, I thank God for their existence. But I realise that they have taken away many important aspects in life. They, at first, seem like some God-send inventions that bring people together. But amazingly, what they do, eventually, is quite the opposite. They do not encourage closeness. They encourage distance. They do not encourage us to talk. They encourage us to be comfortable with silence (except for those push not...

Hello blogspot.. Yu better make yourself iPad friendly, Or else.. I will have no choice but to go wordpress. Sigh.. Why u no understand 'return' button on iPad?

So after so many weeks of absence, we finally had our blessed secret society meeting yesterday. good food sponsored by RRJA (Restoran Rimbun Jaya Abadi), and good friends, including some faces that we don't get to see often heh. There is one face that used to be with us, and for the longest time she was away.. but yesterday she came back. Whether it's a visit or it's a first episode of many, we welcome you~~ :) And what a Good God! Despite all our lacks, He showers us aplenty with joy. One thing about us is that we are unstructured, we can't keep it short, and we love to talk. That's somehow in our DNA. I kinda remember a certain someone who when she first came to our cell group, she looked quiet and she would hesitate to share but once she shared, goodness.. she sure love to share :) and we were always blessed by her sharing. So if one day God were to call us to build a church, I suspect that we will look more like a certain church we know very well rat...

so i finally understood a little bit, of what i means to die everyday waiting for the one you love. yet love you will, because.. love.never.fails.

I must have underestimated the 'culture shock' factor that people always talk about when they move to other countries. Even when I watched the best exotic marigold hotel, I didn't really think much about it. Obviously you would get a shock when you are from a first world country such as UK and you come to a 'developing' country such as India. But Singapore and Indonesia? I adapted comfortably when I moved to Singapore 13 yrs ago. It was only a matter of different language mainly. The 'kiasuism' was not much an issue. Rather it was fun to observe. I guess that was because geographically these two countries are close. And Jakarta, despite being a mess traffic-wise, is actually quite a cosmopolitan city. But now.. me, an Indonesian, who lived in Singapore for 13 years, on my way back to my own country, my own town! I can't believe it. I am having a culture shock. I think partly because I spent my 20s mainly in Singapore. I suspect between...

we have probably met, literally, thousands of people in our lives. and some of them became friends. a very few, became good friends. and if we are lucky, we would have one or two true friends for life. anyway.. the point is.. i think many times we are often drawn to people who seem to be.."great".. and we take for granted those 'ordinary' people who are always there for us. those who are always available for us. but i learn that it would be a great, great mistake to do that. i hope you and i have the wisdom to treasure the ones who truly matter in the end.

One good illustration taken from Mr Maxwell's book: "An adviser to Lincoln recommended a particular person for a cabinet position, but Lincoln balked at the suggestion. He said, "I don't like the man's face." His adviser said, "But sir, he can not be held responsible for his face." But Lincoln replied, "Every man over forty (40 years) is responsible for his face."  When we are kids, we can blame anyone for anything. But as we grow up, we have to understand that we are responsible for where and how we end up in life. Because as far as God is concerned, I believe He only has good plans for us. He doesn't necessarily throw in BMW or Penthouse inside the package, but it sure is going to be a God-glorifying destiny. He died to give us life.. life in abundance.. abundance of testimony of God's goodness. I pray that God will teach us each day to live it..to the fullest..of His glory.

a friend said that it sounds 'galau' hah. but sometimes.. when you are in certain situation, the best you can do to to overcome all the unhappiness and disappointment is to just tell yourself.. mou ii.. forget it..

Finally I pick up a new book, after so many months of hibernation. When you run out of idea of what to write, it's time to read more. I read this advise somewhere. Quite true. So now I am reading John Maxwell's Road Map To Success. It was a birthday present for me, years ago hah. That's how bad a reader I am. But at least there is improvement now heh. It's a very..interesting book. It asks questions that when you are 31 and you are not very sure how to answer, you would start looking at yourself and realise a change has to take place. At the same time, though.. I feel that I will never be a John Maxwell. There are things I would apply.. and things I would not. But overall.. a good book. Especially for those who have been questioning things like.. How can I define success? What is my purpose? How to reach there? etc etc etc.. And you are never too old to admit that you dunno the answer. Coz I believe many people die at old age without knowing the...

so that's how it is. this game that everyone is playing. so play along.

here it comes again.. i don't know how much longer i can take this kind of situation. these are the moments when i wonder if i am suited for this profession. well.. i can only apologise. pointing fingers and finding faults also won't change a thing. can only pray that it will work out well in the end. surely.. God has everything under control. here comes weekend.

it's hard to be positive sometimes, when things are so pathetic and well.. your existence seems to be worse than 'nothing'. hah. but well.. your only option is still.. to be positive.

Depend on God to cause you to be at the right place at the right time, to have the right happenings happen in your life today!- Joseph Prince What Pst Prince was saying in his recent devotional was similar to what we were talking about in our secret society last meeting. It's not always the swift that wins the race, or the strong that wins the battle. It's about the right place and the right time. And we can only rely on God to position us at such a place, such a time, for such a great thing to happen in our life.

i think it's still the most surreal thing ever in life. there is so much to it that you could make movie after movie after movie, song after song after song, just talking about being in love. and the beauty of it is.. no one can be too smart when they are in love.

two things a human can't conceal, sneezing and.. the way you look at someone you love. happiness is wrapped within silliness.

can't help feeling that the more 'mature' you get, the more formulaic love becomes. it's all about finding someone who ticks all or most of the boxes. because your life has become too important to waste on someone who is not good enough. yeah.. sounds right, isn't it?

..something that I foresee coming ... tapi ga nyangka secepet itu.. a friend of mine said this in email. a different friend said almost exactly the same thing, the day before, for a totally different issue. and I kind of have the same issue too -__-" something that I foresee coming.. but didn't expect it to be that fast.. life is indeed full of surprises. i hope.. we don't utter the same words when Christ come for the second time. let's foresee him coming, and expect that to be anytime soon. let's be prepared, and expectant. maranatha!

it's not a good thing to be sentimental, I think. coz time can be cruel and it can make even the most precious thing irrelevant. it changes almost everything too. heck even Singapore has changed, and not for the better, according to some of their citizens. when I first came here in 1996, Singapore was.. how do I put it? It was just different. I fell in love with that Singapore. my heart has not changed since then. Singapore, on the other hand, has changed. I may have attempted to return to my own country. But I have always loved that very Singapore I used to know. and some 'wise' people would tell you it is pointless to look back to that old Singapore. it is gone, for good. and you just have to embrace this new Singapore. I suppose these very people would also be the ones who embrace genetically modified seeds and every other 'solution' that lead to domination of anti-Christ in future. Okay.. I digress. oh well..

actually I think should stop blogging on the shrewd wife, coz somehow those posts lead to many traffic -__-" but how can I stop talking about it when episode after episode, this story continues to amaze me unlike other drama which tend to be draggy after the first 10 episodes. all thanks to xie an zhen's character. this woman is beyond believable. the way she dealt with her husband who forced for divorce, and her cousin who was the third party, and practically everybody else around her. she was anything but 'textbook'. and i admire the script writer for creating such a selfless, magnetic character. i hope one day I too would write such a story.

it wouldn't be proper not to blog anything on my bday hah. well.. this bday.. what can i say? extremely humbling experience indeed. I guess I had been living in my own imagination for the last couple of months. and God especially allow that little bubble to burst today, of all day. Maybe there will be a lot to learn this year. There is only 1 thing that I picked up from today's church service I attended. The thing that Jose Carol first heard of. It's called "out of depth". Perfect terms for the seasons I am walking through. but God, I know you are able.

At the beginning of the year I wasn't sure why I got this verse, though of course you'd be glad to get such a wonderful verse. Now I know that 2012 indeed is a year when more than any other year thus far, I need to hold on tightly to this verse.  Behold, I am the LORD, the God of all flesh. Is there anything too hard for Me? - Jeremiah 32:27

there you are.. standing tall, alive and hopeful. white and everything seems to be right. and there you will be. the crushed autumn leaves, they were swept away by the winter breeze. all is white, all is right. and there you are.

There is still battle to fight and dragon to slay, love to cherish and life to live. sky is still blue and wind will still blow. There is still God. And God is still there.

ai qing rang ren wang le shi jian.. na shi jian ye hui rang ren wang le ai qing ma?

In Channel U there is this Taiwanese celebrity cooking show. I never watch it but last week they happened to invite this guy from the Fierce / Shrewd wife. So I watched it for a while. That week's theme also happened to be Taiwanese street snacks. Like "o wa cien" (fried oyster) and pig intestine mee sua. Oh how I miss Shi Lin ~ Anyway back to the show.. the host came up with this catch phrase: "Ni hai xin  Wen Rui Fan ma?" or. "do you still trust Wen Rui Fan?" They kept using this phrase throughout the show. Wen Rui Fan of course is the male main character in the series who was having marital affair with his wife's younger cousin. Well.. come to think of it, the first thing that is threatened or lost when there is betrayal in relationship is probably trust. The love or care would likely to remain for much longer. It may eventually fade away too with time. And definitely it doesn't take 1000 years, not even 1000 days in many ca...

I think you are either lying or you dunno what 'a thousand year' means :(

Am playing around with a new blog template and once I applied the new template, the few old stuffs were gone @@ But hor.. I like the flipcard mode!! :D and kinda slick look too. shiro phoenix kun! but for some reasons, I guess I'd rather not do the dynamic view. not for now. heh.

All those anxiety was for nothing at the end of the day. Humans.

Thank you to this website: http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/freya-lin for the translation.

In case you have not read this: Forbes Article on Warren Buffet 's 50 Billion Decision I bought Intelligent Investor incidentally. Went to a 2nd hand book shop in Peace Ctr and the friendly uncle recommended me that book. But, unsurprisingly, I could only understand like 10-20% of the content. Maybe need "Intelligent Investor for Dummies"

for anyone who have enough experience of seeing or hearing first hand how marital affairs take place, you would appreciate the accuracy and relevance of the script in this Taiwanese drama. The script is very well written (so far). It's just so.. true. And the wife character is very, very touching. A simple, modest woman who devotes her entire life to her husband and daughter. her character is, ironically, the typical character of wives who become victim of marital affair. Update-> On ep 16 now and the docile wife has begun to shine as she stepped out of the castle she called 'home'. That's how it should be. Marriage should not have stolen life and dream out of her. Neither should she have surrendered those.

He was not my pick of the season when he was running for Idol Season 8. But hey.. this guy is a rare good gem amidst the perverse noise in today's music. *talk as if I know*. But seriously.. most of those chart topping songs.. if you look at the lyrics.. they are just.. you know. Don't get me started with JB and all those freak trending in twitter related to him. Though to be fair he didn't start it. So here goes.. Kris Allen. The guy who stands for his vision of Love. And hopefully so for the rest of his career.

No I am not talking about tithing. I am talking about.. my beloved Donald Duck mug. I am not a big Disney fan but during my high school time, girls were crazy about 'kertas file', if you know what I mean. Those papers with nice pictures of Disney characters, Anime characters, etc. But mostly are Disneys. so inevitably certain friends would want to share their collections with you. and they would ask which is your fave Disney character. and after much thought, I realised that I did like one figure very much. And that's the unlucky, poor, persistent Donald Duck. So I got this Donald Duck mug gift from my brother. And I like it very much. But I got one problem. I dunno where or how to find a suitable cover and er.. saucer? (alas mskdnya), that complement my mug. I went to Ikea and they had everything but 'alas'. And when you drink iced drink, you would realise how troublesome it is without alas. It's probably just a small part. But it makes a lo...

It's Good Friday. Inevitably, we are drawn to the image of the cross. It had been on my mind for the last few days. Christ and the cross. One of the things that came to me was this: Jesus was essentially God. And by that it means.. God died for us. Who would have believed such a statement? if not for the benefit of hindsight and bible, we too would have cried out 'blasphemy'! the YHWH whom the Jews feared, walked among them and helplessly nailed on the cross of shame. the Holy of Holy.. at the cross of punishment. At the cross.. the most spectacular moment in history took place. From eternity to eternity, those hours when Jesus was on the cross.. was the only moment when the Son was separated from the Father. He took on the full impact of God's wrath and punishment over our sins. And He died our death. For the reward of sin is nothing but death. It wasn't dove or lamb or even any prophet up there. It was the Son of God Himself. For what...

Okay.. Now I know why bombie was frustrated with the new layout. This is crazy blogspot -__- How can you guys mess up with the user interface like this? I don't care if it's just me needing to learn how to use this. But when a new user has to use a lil bit more of his brain to find out how to use your interface, you gotta know that you fail already. But well.. I dislike fb timeline too. Seems like most people like it though.

I was thinking of blogging about my day but I guess I am too tired to type it. Had more than an hour battle with a stupid monster called behemoth king on my final fantasy game @_@ Kept losing to this badak gila. Siao gi na -__-" Speaking of ff, only when I searched wiki today that I found out why the game was named final fantasy. It was inspirational really, to think that the biggest name in Japanese rpg history, was titled that way because it was suppose to be the creator's final attempt at making game. The company didn't do well and he didn't do well. Had that game failed, he would have quitted making game. And I would never know Aerith. And very likely, I would have not played rpg at all. So.. I guess it's a good old lesson. Never give up our passion no matter how many times we fail. The next attempt might just be the one that make history.

Caught 'Capitalism- A love story' on HBO. So this guy Michael Moore is doing a film on what capitalism have done to America. One interesting scene is when he took the yellow er.. barrier ribbon?.. with writing "Crime Scene. Do not Pass" that you often see in movie and he put them around buildings where Wall Street big shots like BOA, AIG, etc area. A good, thoughtful film. And in the closing, a country song about Jesus Christ played. It was intriguing to me. And it asks me a simple question I am not sure how to answer. Would I have loved His teaching if Jesus were to walk the earth today?

I think this movie deserves a posting here thanks to one memorable scene. When the little girl Rue died, Katniss Everdeen gave her District 12 respect sign (the three middle fingers thingy) to the camera. People of District 11 who were watching this returned her salute sign. This incident sparked riot in District 11. I didn't understand this sign when District 12's people directed their sign to the Tributes. But Katniss explained that sign in a wonderful way when Rue died. I thought she looked cool and heroic there. At that point I realised where this story was going. And I may be wrong but I feel that the novelist must have borrow inspiration from some Japanese movies such as Battle Royale. But anyway I am glad that this isn't just about a good looking boyfriend who needs blood to maintain his immortality. I am glad that Katniss is a revolution leader in the making. For a moment the riot scene reminds me of our own country's latest 'BBM' incidents. Unfortunatel...

yet another roller coaster week. ups and downs in all sort of way. from football results (by that, I solely mean Arsenal) to works to personal state of discipline. well.. Saturday was over about half an hour ago. so, it's officially April now! that's FAST! met with hadi, ono, and rimbun for dinner. hadi is now holding pink IC. I am happy for him now that he gets to become a citizen in this country that he calls home. But at the same time I feel sad that he has become disilussioned with Indonesia to a point that he doesn't want his kids to be associated with Indonesia in any way. It's sad that he never feels welcome in the country where he was born. And as much as I love my country, I can symphatize with people like hadi. Especially those who experience first hand the '98 riot. And no.. you can't just tell them 'it was all in the past' in the name of harmony. It takes Jesus to heal this nation. It takes Jesus to reconcile these people. And it takes us, Go...

In the language of jin yong fans, This is one of those moments when I wish I have Huang Rong by my side. Oh well..

Shalom Sehubungan dengan waktu dan jumlah orang yang punya hati/ berminat/ mampu untuk latihan choir sangat minim dalam perayaan Paskah (Kematian dan Kebangkitan Tuhan Yesus yang telah menyelamatkan kita semua.......) Maka Choir dibatalkan. Oh my...

Today's meeting went well, thank God. We counselled the daughter, and I passed the dad my dtz name card heh. I do wish I have a trustworthy and reliable partner in sg and in Jakarta. Or at least, in one of them. Now I am juggling between the two cities. But most importantly now, I pray that this signal the breakthrough that we so desperately need. If I do keep a good book keeping like bombie does, And if I do have a 70% saving ratio, I would have needed sleeping pills by now ^^ Well..a lot of things have happened recently. I can only pray that we all sail thru this storm by His grace. I'm sorry too that I am far from perfect. At times, I really have no idea what I should do. So much for being 'wise'. Moment like this remind of VOG song: kusadari.

When you're kids, no problem is too complicated for you to share. I remember I always took time to tell my mum my day at school every time I reached home. But when you grow up, you encounter moment when.. You don't know whom to share your burden with. Not even your parents. And in some occasions, especially your parents. At times your best option is the lesser evil thing to do. at times you simply made a big mess that you have no way to justify yourself. You just have to take the shooting, bite the bullet. When you have nothing to say. When you have no one to lean on. You can only wait upon the Lord, in quietness and trust.

Moteki is the period is one's life when the person becomes most attractive to the opposite sex. This is the title of the currently showing Japanese movie- Love Strikes. The story revolves around an unattractive nerd whose season of moteki strikes at the most depressing low period of his life. The next thing he knows, he got 4 beautiful girls to choose from. Heh.. Japanese always have weird terms and weird ideas. But it got me thinking. A korean actress once said that she believed woman hit the peak of their beauty at the age of 24. So that should be women's moteki, generally. And what about guys? I hope it's not at the age of 40 heh.

The movie I am looking forward to is "Salmon Fishing in the Yemen". The screenwriter of Slumdog Millionaire. That sure raises some expectation. The trip I SOO Looking forward to is Isarel. So many times when I tell a friend about the trip, I will invariably get one of the following responses: -it's so expensive -it's not safe, or.. -why don't we go to xxxx instead? Well, they gotta realise that Israel is more than just a holiday trip. It's so much more than that. And as for my intention to build my base in Indonesia.. somehow there is still no breakthrough, be it business opportunity or ministry calling. strangely.. it's in Sg that I find openings in both matters. Teaching KOM (or SOM, or whatever it's called now), is 1 thing that comes into picture and it really interests me. And there is another form of 'teaching' that comes into picture too. Oh my.. Well God.. I've never walked on water, but if it's You.. do call me and, I will walk ...

seems like it's a trend now to get angmoh looking chinese to sing. this song is good tho.

lately I have been meditating a lot on the word 'joy'. in prayer time, in ways I do not understand, I learn that when we come in humility before the Lord, we find an explicable joy as we find ourselves drowning in His love. when we set aside our concern for the lacks, when we set aside our fear for the unknowns, when we take time to simply abide in His love, and allow Him to abide in us, that's when His joy becomes our joy. And our joy becomes complete. and it occurs to me that Christ, even now, is rejoicing all the time over us! He rejoices for two reasons. He rejoices because He knows that He Has Conquered the World. It is Done. It is FINISHED. The battle was won. it was game over for the dark side. Nothing could've undone His work on the cross. in our eyes, it seems like a never ending battle against sin. it seems like an ever changing destiny, where one day we feel like we are heaven-bound and the other day, we are not so sure. But in Jesus' eyes, our destiny is...

Finishing off (or rather, fully rewriting) the entry that I intended to post yesterday. So in between bombie's call and her arrival with andreas at plasing, couple of things happened. and I was thinking bout some stuff I think worth writing. there was, twice, call from my 80s year old distant relative who was on a noble but frankly, unnecessary matchmaking mission. then there was this thought about wedding guest list. think I got to make disclaimer 1st.. I don't have to have issue with gay for me to write about gay. I just have to think that it's worth writing. got it? so.. back to the point. my theory is.. if anything, the inclusion or exclusion of your name in an old time friend's wedding guest list is the pass/fail benchmark of your relationship with the person thru out the years. of course when you 'pass', you also have first class honors, 2nd class, or merit. which benchmarks are harder to define. and btw.. if you are now on an active terms with that friend...

buat yg pernah baca novel detektip 'STOP', mgkn inget yg namanya oscar. personel STOP yg gendud, hobi makan coklat, dan generous. dia punya bokap yg persis bentuk dan hobinya, beserta nyokap yg at the other extreme, kurus dan vegetarian. dan lately, *smoga dia ga baca blog ini*, ada seorang usher baru di grj kita yg wajahnya bikin ati adem, rambutnya ky samo hung jaman dulu, body nya jg mirip2, dan namanya.. oscar! OhMy.. gua cuman pengen bilang kalo alangkah baiknya kalo grj kita punya lbh byk usher dgn wjh friendly macam dia. ga usa ganteng, ga usa cakep, tp at least sincere dan damai tampangnya ^__^

The dreaded 2012 is about to complete its first quarter. Greece is currently looking safe but Europe is still in danger of a major meltdown. Greece, after all, represents only a fraction of Euro economy. Who knows what gonna happen next? All I see and know is that.. 2012 has forced us to stare point blank at the most essential things in life, the basic of basics. Here and there I heard stories of family members getting sick, and I myself have been spending quite a bit on doctor this year -__- If any of you are expert in stock market, do let me know which pharmaceutical company is good value to invest in. I am so going to invest in health business hah. And church-wise, my friend thought this year we will see a great shaking, where those churches who promote worldly value and wealth will be shaken to the core. Then churches will come to their sense and back on their knees before the unshakeable core: Christ. We'll see. :) In general though, I agree that this will be time of pruning. ...

I was SOO Enchanted by this IU clip, for reason that I am not sure I know, that I accidentally posted a wall on TLG fb page -____- So.. I guess I better not post the clip on fb liao. Here goes... somehow, dunno why, my fave clip of the year so far ^__^ Not that I am caught by k-wave. but they sure do have nice clips!

lines of green lights.. how far can we run before we have to stop? feigning ignorance.. how many times do we escape before our eyes betray us? we never knew how to make this perfect, approval is not something we are born with. and the right timing never seem to arrive, maybe the clock is dead to begin with. what if we knew the answer all along?

This k-pop song is playing on radio lately. And I think it's quite catchy. Dunno anything about this group tho.

it never fails to amaze me, how fast time flies. it was freaking SIX years ago when I first went to japan with bun san, and met with some Singaporean friends, one of them being a tigress who turned out to be dian and fenny's school mate at NUS. well she came across like a tigress because she was always on constant 'fight' with our tour guide who tried too much to impress her. and it was more than TWO years ago since we last met, when she asked me to help her looking for a house. then.. she asked me what's the agent commission she has to pay as condo buyer. and i said.. we take commission from seller in condo transaction. to which she replied, "you shouldn't have told me that." lately she's on house hunting mode again. but I did not really meet up with her until today. looks like she has mellowed a lot since six years ago. interesting how people could change. still bubbly but not as loud. and quite amazing how in two years, she could up her budget from ...

Good one from AllWorship Lord, I am committed to traveling through life with the people that you have assigned for me to help and those to help me. Give me the discernment and wisdom to successfully manage every relationship. I invite you to develop my character to maintain these relationships. And now, I celebrate you for getting the glory in every connection that I have. In Jesus' Name. Amen.

The words first appear on bible in 1 Samuel. I thought it was such a great phrase. It means stone of help. 'Thus far the Lord has helped us', said Samuel. Read it few days ago. And somehow ko Harun mentioned these words again when he prayed before sermon on Sunday. Looking back, indeed the Lord has been my Eben Haezer. And looking forward, I know He will still be my Eben Haezer. Right to the last breath.. right to the last beat of my heart.

This is your chance, ladies! Oxford Dictionary of English Folklore: leap year The dominant belief about leap year is that it is the only time that a woman may propose marriage to a man, rather than what was considered to be the natural order of things: the other way round. This was often called ‘The Ladies' Privilege’. At the time of writing, it is probably true to say that younger English people would not be aware of the belief if the media did not run features on the subject every fourth February. In previous times, when relationships between the sexes were more rigid and formal, there were a number of subsidiary beliefs surrounding the Ladies’ Privilege. Some said that it was only on Leap Year day, that is 29 February, that it was valid, while others believed that a man proposed to in this way could not refuse, except on substantial payment—a silk gown, or £ 100, and so on. Indeed, it was widely reported (erroneously) that there had been a Scottish Act of Parliament in the 13th ...

Speaking of 'being a fan', Noriko Sakai was the one I invested in the most. Bought some CDs, photo books, posters, etc. If my brother bought Na Xie Nian CD in his trip to taiwan, I bought noriko sakai's photo books and CDs. Sadly.. I never got to meet her -__- In any case, I guess the days of filling my bedroom walls with posters are over. Nowadays.. I only wish I could meet and take picture with some of these ppl. So I kinda hope I would meet someone this year hah. Jesseca Liu being one of them. To my surprise.. her fans DID plan a gathering with her this Sat @_@ I only found out about this fan group thingy on fb tonight. Didn't even know that they exist. At first I was like.. 'Wow... this is interesting!' And then I saw the wall post on the fan t-shirt: And this cap: with the following caption: Isn't it awesome if we were to wear it together with our Fan Club Tee? Get one today! And I was like... 'Oookayy....' I'm imagining being among these fa...

No new year resolution yet for 2012. I guess.. it's just not working for me- this resolution thingy, most of the time. But goals.. yes. hope.. yes. dream.. yes. I got big ones for 2012. And may every week of this year counts for all of us. May none of the 52 weeks be insignificant. It starts with basic thing tho. like health. Today I went to consult a chiropractor who treated my back issues more than 12 yrs ago. A bit of massage, nice cracking, and some invaluable pointers on correcting my postures, plus.. a cup of TWG tea. And there you go.. $250. -__- should've studied medicine. Health makes a big leap in terms of my personal priority. As far as worldly matter is concerned, I believe we should pay real attention to health this year :) Anyway it's 27 Jan today, it's Fann Wong and Ruby Lin's birthday hah. Almost 'met' fann wong when she appeared on CNY eve event at Chinatown. Too bad this time I don't get to share the stage with her like 12 yrs ago. But ...

the only conclusion I have after all these years is this.. we.. guys, are kinda dumb when it comes to certain 'things'. there are some gentlemen out there who qualify to be cast as disney prince but.. many of us are not. and apparently some of us remain dumb for years. a dumb, smiling, wanderer.

Sigh.. what do you do when you are not even qualified as a writer yet and you already are suffering from acute writer's block?? -____- Done with the traveling, done with some movies, still no effect.... my 'ten steps behind' is now turning into tens of thousand steps behind already :( Maybe I need to read Gu Long again.

Israel. If it has to come faster, I will need lil miracle from my Provider.

I like song when it makes me cry. I like music when it makes me dreamy. In my commoner opinion, a good song has the capability to touch your heart musically and transport your mind lyrically. Saw that 'Hello, Again' jpop song by Juju on animax. It took me less than 30 seconds to like it. Just like the song ' Na xie nian' :) while na xie nian's lyric transports me to the past, 'hello, again' music (or rather, video clip) brings out my tears. Anyway, in the spirit of randomness, if you're wondering where all those HK singers are.. my cousin introduced G.E.M to us. apparently she's hot now. at one point, on stage in the midst of concert, she told her fans that she was married. To Christ. But since somehow I am not too fond of her songs (yet, I guess), let me share this song instead :D

In a way it was not comparable to other commercial movies in the sense of scripting, acting, etc. But in a way, I suppose that's how it should be. Not over the top. Just like a sermon.. delivered in a movie format. It gotta be believable. Coz in reality our life can be quite ordinary most of the times. I think the movie truly delivered their main message, "turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers". Fatherhood is not a role where 'good enough' is good enough. a good point to ponder. And it got me thinking this question (and you may too), "if I die now, what will be my legacy?"

A short and straight forward verse of the year for me this time ard. It could have meant anything and everything tho. But if there is something I really want this year, I think it would be to see my education consultancy business takes off and even better, soars. Is there anything too hard for the Lord? The dust has finally settled now that I am back from Medan. No more hectic traveling for the next.. uhm.. 2 weeks? The wedding at Medan was pretty much a big family reunion. And I dunno about urs big family but for mine, the golden rule is to speak 'just enough to be polite' and stay out of arguments or gossips. And cold head is much needed.. I guess. Looking at the elders, I do hope when I am an old man one day, I would be a wise and sensible one. The wisest and most sensible elder I ever know in the entire big family was the one we met on our last day at Medan. At 'Taman Eden' 'resting place'. To my mum she was her beloved grand mother and mother at the same ti...